Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
