This is the prime rib incident all over again
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
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I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
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The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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