? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
We left the knife in your bed.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
