sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
