white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
