On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
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How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
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I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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