if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
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you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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