Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
No...this little piggys going to the bar
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
