The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
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