What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize