the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
foreskin is a definite game changer
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
