but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
