I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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