so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize