to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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