He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
