he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize