just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
