He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
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