the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
