it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
