i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
