i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
