I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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