That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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