you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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