Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
My pussy is not your playground.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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