so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Randomize
