i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Even my vagina gasped.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
