You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I can tuck mytits in my pants
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize