We named our party play list daddy issues
false alarm. still invincible.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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