Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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