I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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