Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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