i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize