Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize