Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize