Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Randomize
