great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
