he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
