I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
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