Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
