This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
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Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
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If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
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