My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Randomize
