ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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