I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
