i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
