What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
So here I am, sexting at work.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
