The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
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He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
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I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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