ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Dicks are not precious.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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