I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.