You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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