What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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